Should You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse?

Wedding RingShort answer is it depends. In most state laws, remarrying an ex-spouse is completely fine provided both partners are not currently married to another person. However, deciding on whether or not to remarry an ex lies on many factors, but more importantly, on your preparedness to be with your ex-partner again.

Studies, including the one headed by Dr. William J. Doherty of the University of Minnesota, show that 10-15 percent of couples who divorced remarried their ex-spouse eventually after breakup. Furthermore, 72 percent of reunited couples stayed together.

Making Remarriage Work

Your first marriage may have ended up in a sad way, but this time, you can make it work. When there’s love, respect, and understanding, and both partners know how to give and take, there’s no way this time won’t work. The Law Offices of Ian S. Mednick offers helpful advice below.

1. Counseling

Perhaps the first step when entering remarriage should be counseling. Seeking out premarital counseling is important to better understand the problems and issues that damaged your first marriage. The Family Therapy and The American Association for Marriage can recommend family relationship therapists and would be able to help.

2. Give More Effort

Understand that for the marriage to work this time, you need to prepare yourself for hard work. There will be a lot of trying and understanding from both ends.

3. Stay Away from Negativity

Friends and relatives who hear the news will most likely have something to say. Expect to hear good and bad. Listen, but do not engage. Stay on the positive side and never let their opinions affect your thinking.

4. Considering a Prenuptial Agreement

Your first marriage ended up in divorce. This, too, can end that way. To protect your assets and your partner’s, it is best to enter a prenuptial agreement.

5. Other Things to Work Out

Remember to inform the state courts that handle your alimony and child custody arrangements. Get advice on their requirements to have previous arrangements cancelled. You might as well want to contact the Social Security Administration to update the payment scheme, and your health insurance provider if you want to include your spouse in your health plan.

Remarrying an ex-spouse is not for everyone. Only those who can accept their partners again fully, are prepared for hard work, and are willing to grow with their partner can make the second time work.